Saturday, March 22, 2014

"The Task" is an eight part series in the New York Times written by Olivia Stone about the emotional and overwhelming task of going through her parent's home of 30 years after her father's death. She poignantly captures the emotions she experiences during the monumental task it takes to sort through a houseful of belongings and memories.  She wrestles with how to decide what to throw away and what to keep, and the fear of throwing away the wrong things that could erase a loved one in the process. Despite the angst it created she comes to understand her parents through the experience and the glimpses that emerge hold surprises and personal revelations. Reading her mother's diaries and letters felt intrusive at first but she discovers her mother was more like her than she realized. How much they both loved traveling and the sense of freedom it gave them. A minimalist at heart she came to understand the significance of all their personal belongings that provoked long forgotten memories, the worn couch where one of her friends slept during a blizzard, her dad snoozing on it after cooking Christmas dinner all day. Her mother who died when she was in her 20s came alive to her when she came upon  one of her scarfs that still held the scent of her favorite perfume after all those years. Her father's fascinating work as a journalist traveling the world in search of stories was all there in carefully organized cabinets.   
At some point we will all face "the task" that comes after loved one's die and leave behind their possessions to disperse, but Olivia Stone helps us to see that despite the grief and pain it causes, it can be a life altering journey to be embraced where the memories of our past and long gone loved ones come alive and comfort us.